Siobhan O'Loughlin Siobhan O'Loughlin

Please Do Vibe 2024

Squares: we did another year.

On this day in 2024, I’m feeling rather strange. Vocal nodes paired with a bad case of laryngitis has me in a serious funk, and I’m clinging to try to grasp some feeling of positivity after two nights of nightmares in a row where I was trapped in a body that would never speak again. I’m not good with horror films. I’m not good with the horror world we live in. When I feel in the depths of my sadness, sometimes I turn to art — but more than that, y’all, I turn to community. I’m so grateful, that despite everything, I have so many people to be thankful for, and two months ago, I spent a whole weekend with them. They are:

Heather Frew.

I STILL laugh when I think of you and how you learned to camp last year, because, “What was I gonna do? Not come???” And how right you were TO come, how beautifully you’ve blossomed into an actual camper (!!) and how this year, you’ve graced us with more beautiful physical gifts AND a healing session. I’m so grateful for your gorgeous sprit, your centering presence — and the love you hold so deep in your heart.


Ally Ibach

I’m such a fan. Your level of humor mashed with sincerity, your talents paired with you authentic AF energy — you bring SO MUCH with you wherever you go, and I am so damn lucky that I got to participate in some sessions with you this year. Love you, Friend.

Mallory Vance

WAIT MALLORY WAIT I never even went into your van!!! FREAKING WHAT. Truly though: you anchor me and lock me in with everything we get to do together. I don’t know how you do it — I don’t know how you provide so much balance to everyone around you. Thank you for the deep empathic kindness you bring to all of us — prepared with game designer FUN AND HILARITY. Are you kidding me??

Stone Fruit

THE FASHION. The sunnies. The leggings. The laughter. The celebration. The heartbreak. The struggle, the perseverance, the giggles. All of these I associate with you — that and, your stunning performance as facilitator in Nick’s game. You rocked it — as you rock my world.


Natalya Brusilovsky

HI I LOVE YOU. What a WONDER it was to get to showcase your talents this year!!! Thank you thank you thank you xonemillion for packing such a punch. You SO helped us to seal the moment. You brought SO much clarity, vulnerability, and joy out of all of us with your two awesome workshops. Of course one night we were laughing about despair, and the next we’ve got cell phones in choke holds. Your spirit feels in deep community with mine — and I am beyond grateful to know you.


Danielle Cintron

DANI. You strutted right on into this space and ROCKED IT AND OWNED IT. Even BEFORE your imminent arrival, you were messaging me to help with grocery orders, to provide flashlights — to overall be a huge champion of the humans in this space — and then BOOM, you’re singing and dancing in Mob Barley. I love how you meld into community — I love all that you contribute, all that you provide. I love you.

JARJ

My dear, dear friend. For 18 years I have blessed by your presence, so fucking lucky to grow right alongside you and to see you grow. There is something so special in looking at you and knowing how well you know me — how I can be free and flawed and you’ll still be there to celebrate me. Thank you for being in my life. Thank you for the gift of YOU at Please Do Vibe.

Preston Davis

PRESTON, don’t tell anyone I said this — but you are THE most photogenic of all of us. No kidding. Your smile, your absolute PRESENCE! What a joy. I had no idea that contra would be EXACTLY what our group needed to laugh super hard and have such a great physical celebration. You really nailed it, and I value so much our second year of an early morning group hike. It was wonderful — as are you.


Dennissa Young

My family. You are cut from the same cloth, a true spirit I am so privileged to be connected to. You are such an absolute asset to this community, a seriously sacred holder of space and heart and feelings. THANK YOU for being camp counselor, for being you. Please know that I am always, always in your corner. For sure.


Josh Feintuch

Or, Josh I. SWEET LOVE, this event wouldn’t EXIST without you!!! THANK YOU for all of the heart and soul you put into it last year in order to ensure that it existed again this year — I love you so much and cherished our time at the fire on night one, and was delighted by your dances with Preston at contra.

Megan Markham

Come the fuck ON Princess of my LIFE!!!! How did you get to be so special, so magical, so fucking brilliant?! THANK YOU (and your wife) for coming to the Vibe. I know the journey was a lot. But your energy is so valuable to this community, and your special little wink of wonder does not go unnoticed by me. I will always remember dancing and laughing with you in 2024.

Amanda Simmons

My darling one. Quieter than your spouse but not to be unnoticed. Fan favorite already in Bellingham, and closer to my heart than ever this year. Thank you (and your wife) for making the trek out to us — seeing you relax in the rain in the hot tub alone was wonderful. Love, love, love you.


Lauren Arneson

Hey, friend. You kicked ASS this year. Thank you so much for being a CHAMPION of the kitchen. Eric personally celebrated you to me — saying that you kept him in check, that you managed him entirely and that the process was expedited a million times better because of you. I want you to know that when I saw your tears at events, at performances and sessions — that that is all of the reward I could possibly ask for in hosting an event like this. I thank you so much — from my heart, for sharing so very much of yourself and your spirit with us. I appreciate it more than you will know.


Clara Bella

CB!!!! THANK YOU for making the journey!! Thank you for sharing space and time with us. I hope you know (and see and feel) the ways in which we all value you so completely. Thank you for wanting to be with us. Thank you for showing up like you do — like very few do — and that letter you gave me? Was beautifully written. Just FYI.

Adam Brooks

Vladam, Vladam — the core of this crew. Truly. A friend to ALL. A human with depth and capacity and wake-up-for-the-waterfall love. I’m SO grateful that you joined us again this year and shared more DND delights. I hope you know how much we appreciate you. I hope you see that all that you give is received with such tremendous appreciation. I hope that we give back to you all that you give to us.

Nick Fortugno

I’m a fan. You know that. I was THRILLED that we got to play one of your games this year. Thrilled to have you hang out and facilitate a convo (even though you’re like, dude I don’t really need to do this). I was thrilled that you wanted to come and be with us again this year. You bring joy, curiosity, and OPINIONS everywhere you go — and that triple threat is something I love very much in a human. Thank you for being part of my world.


Hideki Watanabe

My sweet, wonderful friend. You helped me do a thing I HAVE NEVER DONE as a performer and it was wild and scary and new and exciting and we didn’t even think to record it until we immediately started and I wish I had thought sooner, I wish I had done better as a performer with you/done better by you but I’m so GRATEFUL to you for vibing with me, for trusting me with your talents, for wanting to experiment and create together. I hope we can figure out more. In this shitty year we’ve had, I look back on our special event and I feel happiness that I tried something new with a person I admire. I love you, friend.


Kacey Statmats

Powerhouse Witch. Positive energy, twinkle in your eye, EXCELLENT LISTENER. AKA a freakin ASSET and secret weapon to any party of adventurers. I LOVE that Jack brought us together, it means so so freakin much to me that you ride with us. Having less people this year meant that I got more time with you, and I loved every moment of it. Also, what the fuck was that prism — it fucking rocked.

Parker Sela

Oh my WONDERFUL friend. You are a goddamn rock. I don’t honestly know what I love more about you at the Vibe — having your help, your spirit, your energy — or seeing you so celebrated by so many. One of my favorite things about our time together is being reminded of all of the inner dialogues and communications happening amidst the PDT network — I had completely forgotten about Adam’s Letter to the Professor — you and Jarj performing it was a delight beyond words.

Meredith Conti

SHUT THE HECK UP I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. I am HONORED that you spent your weekend with us. Your contributions on the first night alone resonated with me so deeply — it is as though you have always been family, and I hope you always will be. I can’t believe I got to play DND with you. Your outfit (unsurprisingly) rocked.


Sam Eddington

You just have no idea how special you are. I feel like that sounds patronizing. I don’t mean it to be. I mean it to simply say that you bring SO very much to this community. You are an active listener. You are full of heart and sincerity. You bring focus and compassion, sensitivity and courage to everything you do. You have the depth of a wishing well and a true lion heart. Whether we’re writing poetry, singing songs, sharing stories, or, you know — crying?? — I love you so much and am GRATEFUL that you give your all to all of us at the Vibe.


Emily Cordes

You thoughtful, creative, generous person. I see so much of myself in you — a persistence and desire to create, to share, to give — all the while managing so much anxiety that is boiling over all the damn time. Hold tight to your heart. Remember who you are amidst all the struggle — and know that you are so deeply loved and appreciated. Getting to write with you this year was truly a privilege and a pleasure for me to sit with my notebook — something I never do anymore. You gave me that chance — thank you.

Eric Lister

YES, CHEF. Oh my lord. Thank you so much for joining us for this wild ride. Thank you for trusting me to do this, for giving it a whirl, for being chill AF (at least when I was with you, bahahah) and making our lives SO MUCH BETTER AND SIMPLER due to the magical fact that we got to be taken care of by you. Thank you for volunteering for this, thank you for your big heart. I love you so much, my friend.

Siobhán Stergis

My sister. My fellow suffer-er. My fellow warrior. My namesake and heart centered human. I am so so grateful to be so aligned with you. When you decided to join us again, my heart ZOOMED out of my chest an I’m fuckin thrilled we got to yoga on that stage with you. I’m thrilled that you were able to share your poetry and your compassion with us — it is, as always and as ever, a huge gift that does not go unnoticed by me. Thank you for so effortlessly being part of the glue that keeps this community together. I adore you.


Dena Dahilig

WHO KNEW that those voice over happy hours or WHATEVER THE HECK THEY WERE would lead to such a valuable friendship?! I am freakin OVERJOYED that you joined us for this year’s vibe. You were INCREDIBLE. You packed a punch to everything you were a part of, and I will NEVER forget your talent show performance that absolutely blew me away. Thank you for bringing your whole self. Thank you for sharing your confidence and strength of spirit with all of us. It's an inspiration and a genuine burst of BRIGHT in this dark world.


Megan Allen

Hey, gorgeous. YOU ARE THE ENTIRE SKY OF STARS!! I want more than anything for you to look around and to see that — to see all of us adoring you and reflecting your light. We love you so much and you did such a whizbang of a disco for us. Thank for that. Thank you for everything. Never forget what your spirit contributes to EVERY SPACE you are in.

Brandon Santoro

OH BRANDON. What in the world would I do without you? Thank you for streamlining so much of this labor for me. Thank you for being so deeply organized. Thank you for enjoying being organized. Thank you for caring deeply about all of us. Thank you for putting so much energy and labor into this project, when you could be (and should be?!) doing all sorts of other things in the world. I love you more than words can say, and I’m so, so grateful.

James Martin

GROSS I’m writing to my partner amidst all this?? Hah. YES. You were a part of this digital community BEFORE you were my partner — what a love story indeed. Thank you for being a part of everything, this year and last. Thank you for believing in me. I know you are my biggest fan — and it’s the best feeling in the world to have someone love me like that. I never thought it was possible. Thank you.

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Siobhan O'Loughlin Siobhan O'Loughlin

Hello, Squares

This Is How I’d Start A Zoom.

When I perform on Zoom for Please Don’t Touch the Artist, I have a way of doing things. First, is an anxiety-ridden rehearsal with Chevy, my Joker, and Mellie, my sound designer and board op, where I am stressed about, you know, everything, including how I am trying to work beyond my boundaries but within my budget. This is actually impossible, but Chevy and Mellie are patient with me as I knock back some whiskey shots before we let all the folks in after pressing record.

When the squares populate on our collective screens, there is no pretense of hiding the performer before said show. We’re all there, and I’m there, singing hello with my parasol as I individually recognize each person in the room. This can sometimes take upwards of 15 minutes.

If I had done so at Please Do Vibe, it would have gone something like this:


PARKER FREAKIN SELA.

What a dynamite, powerhouse of a woman in our midst. What a magnificent beacon of humanity who somehow has the energy and the wherewithal to make me feel like things aren’t falling the heck apart. Parker, I used to only think of that guy Andrew when it comes to Tulips. Now, I think of you. I think of you with the Red Queen. I think of you with peanuts and how we never want you to die of peanuts, which is a wildly horrible death. I’m so grateful for your help, your smile, and your VIBE. What a vibe. I love you. Thank you.

DUNCAN STONEFRUIT SIR.

I know. I know it was crazy hella stressful for you to come to the Vibe. I know you were anxious and being around people created more anxious and etc etc so forth but I want you to KNOW just how much our space was made BETTER because you were there. Dancing with you, laughing with you, improv-ing with you, was wonderful. I am so proud of you for being brave and truly hope in your heart that it was worth the journey — it made a difference for all of us, I know, that you were there.

JONATHAN ROCHKIND

The caps locks are for yelling like I do on zoom, I hope this is translating, not to look like I’m yelling, like, at you guys, you know?

Anyway okay Jonathan, I love you so much. You are such a joy. I love talking to you, and honestly I feel like everyone should hire you to populate a party vibe because you bring the coolest fuckers in existence into our lives: that shows good judgement, sir, and it means a lot to me. Also, genuinely, SiobhAlice joked about this, but one of the joys of the vibe was that you brought out your ACCORDION (!!!) and I’d never seen it in all of these years on zoom. Love you so much and can’t wait for the next thing.


MALLORY VANCE

You are my hero. Your energy is calming, your organization is life-giving, and the creative work you do is wonderful. THANK YOU for bringing us We Are Not Vampires. Thank you, so much, for sharing your light all weekend long and for what your friendship brings all of us. Thank you containing multitudes and then helping me run the talent show when I was basically unalive. I’m so grateful and I so very much look forward to more.


ALEX BACTAT

You’re a vibe. Truly. THANK YOU for workin twice out on the mainstage for events that…never happened on the mainstage, lololol, and thank you for hauling ass to be amazing and make this event amazing. The margarita popsicles were also a vibe and your grande entrance to the dance party was highly appreciated. Thank you for loving our girl and for supporting her as she does all of the important things she cares about, all at once. Please cook for her and make sure she drinks water. Thank you. Love you.

ALLIE MAROTTA

Allie. You did so much to make this happen. Thank you for starting this all up by first of all interpreting spreadsheets for me. Managing peoples’ information got so overwhelming and you made it POSSIBLE. Your warmth and tenderness make a big difference to all of us, and your craft activation SLAPPED. I wish we could have done more of it. Thank you for sharing yourself with me, and truly — thank you for insisting I take the small dome to sleep in even tho I would have slept in a tent. You helped me take care of myself when I wouldn’t have. Love you lots.


JAMES Bunny MARTIN

Thank you for believing in me and seeing the value in what I do. Thank you for extending your heart to others because you believe in what I do. I love you. And also: this community loves you.


JARJ

Captain to Number One: I love you. Thank you. Your friendship and comaraderie mean the world to me. I can’t thank my lucky stars enough that Towson brought you into my life, and the feeling that we’ll be together always is so comforting when my insides feel in turmoil. You’ve been a consummate audience member, improviser, actor, director, and Joker for PDT. And now, you’re everyone’s IRL friend and lover, too — and that brings me so much joy.

CLARA BELLA

We didn’t get to have you this year and that was so very devastating. I’m so so sorry that you couldn’t be with us, and whatever you went through — please know that we were thinking of you and missing you. You are so valued and appreciated by this community, and I only wish we could have given back to you and all of the love you give us by hugging you last weekend. Next time. Next time.

CHEVY

What would we do without you? It’s a question I still think about and consider and ask myself to this day regarding this community. You had BIG shoes to fill in Dennissa, and you do it so beautifully. It filled my heart so so very much to have the opportunity to watch you guide our friends and lovers in your practice, and then to experience your poetry amongst the group, and your energy—the GIFT of you and your presence of compassion and love — I couldn’t ask for a better namesake or a bigger hearted love. You are my heart.


PRESTON DAVIS

You beautiful love. You heart and soul. You generous, gentle, beautiful spirit. To this DAY I thank my lucky stars that we have you in our world and our presence. You align yourself with your character day in and day out, you put your body and mind where your values are — I see it in you, I see so much in you, and I am grateful, honored and privileged you walk this earth with me. I love you.

ADAM BROOKS

My dear, dear friend. My thoughtful, sensitive yes man. Thank you so so much for showing up so hard to PDV. Thank you for cooking for 45 people for the first time in your life, for maintaining your cool while we all shouted GO ADAM from the rave, and thank you for your incredible DND skills and for whipping our cleanup and organization into serious shape on our Sunday load out day. I love you and am so very grateful for you, Commander Troi.


ARIEL LOPEZ

It’s not fair to say that you were my favorite hug. But I think it’s okay to admit and accept that your hug in particular was the one I would think about and look forward to leading right up to the Vibe when I would get stressed. Knowing that you would be there with us brought me peace — as your presence always has. I have so many very good memories of our time together these brief few days — but most notably when you peered from your book on the hammock and said, “You know, Siobhán, I AM an introvert.” Lord. I love you. And THANK YOU for your beautiful photos.


CALEB HUNT

Did you know that you were saved in my phone as Caleb Star, bc I didn’t actually know your last name, and thought of you as the star of PDT anyway? Thank you for sharing your starshine with us. Thank you for coming to PDV even though you had a bunch of shit to do. I know we basically got to hang out 0% but I ALSO know that other people got to enjoy the pleasure of your wonderful company — you are a true celebrity amongst us, and we adore you.

MEGAN MARKHAM

You’re not crying, I’M CRYING!! Actually you’re crying AND I’M CRYING. Actually, there is so much crying and it’s so exhausting and cathartic and will you be in my life forever please, because your energy is essential to my life force??? THANK YOU for running Camp & Courage. THANK YOU for taking hold of the talent show. Thank you for being in my life and my heart. I love you so so much and can’t wait for more things.

JOSH FEINTUCH

Hoooooo boy we did it. We did it?!?! Holy cats. I can’t thank you enough for believing in me, for putting your spirit and heart and soul behind the things that I do. We’ve had so many years of friendship, of evolution, of growth and of hardship — thank you for all of the millions of things you did to make Please Do Vibe happen.I could not have done this at all, AT ALL!! Without you.


Krista Verrastro

Dear Krista. Thank you so much for baring the rustic-ness of our world in order to give so much heart and love to Please Do Vibe. I am SUCH a fan of your drama therapy sessions. You do wonders with your work, and your work truly resonated with all of your participants. Thank you for your positive energy, your thoughtfulness, your charm, your friendship, and your regularly compassionate perspective that provides so much to our community. You are so very beloved.


Dad

You slayed the sleepover Dad Vibe. THANK YOU for bringing the PA and supporting so many of our musician folks. I’ll never forget the first night where you got all of our music set up as well as bringing fries in to a bunch of nerds playing DnD. It was wonderful to see my friends getting to experience your music — everything you did and contributed to this counted. I can’t thank you enough. Love you, Dad.

Mom

I know the vibe is not necessarily your vibe. I know rustic and outdoors is not your thing. I know cooking in a downpour wasn’t exactly, um, fun. But I’m SO glad and grateful that you came to this thing, so that all of the people who have gotten to know you could finally meet you. Your energy was just incredible, and your food and your CARE that went into your food was also actually pure love. I am so beyond lucky to have you as my Mom, and, as it were, the Vibe Mom. Love you so so so much.


Sweet Sweet Roby.

My LA Ride or Die. You are such a champion of humanity. I cannot possibly express what your friendship has meant to me in this past year, and what your personhood and PLACE in PDT has meant to me. Thank you for showing up and being full of love. Thank you for being my advocate and my friend. Thank you for all of the ways that you put yourself out there and try new things. You are brave, and thoughtful, and I am a better person because you are in my life. Sorry I was dead on your last new york night — but dang. I really was.


Mellie Way

I JUST WANT TO PUT CRYING EMOJIS AND SOUND EFFECTS but that doesn’ t WORK in this long form very word oriented format I am using!! I ADORE YOU. I was so. SO grateful that you wanted to come to the Vibe. Thank you so much beyond ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING for giving yourself to this event. I can’t wait to hear about London and also omg I need to schedule more shows with you now even tho it seemed like it was over, it actually was not. ahhahahahah. um. Love you. My heart.

Kacey Statmats

Hello, Camera Off. I LOVE YOU. I was so excited to meet the person I was 90% sure I had never seen the face of. Do you know how fascinating it is to know you are coming to actually have everyone see your face for three whole days when you are such a cameras off zoomer?? Kacey, your smile is everything. You never have to turn your camera on, but I’m SO so grateful that you joined our gang with your goodness and positivity and BRIGHT. FREAKIN. SPIRIT. Love you. Thank you, truly.

Andy Daugherty

WHELP I don’t want to cry, but. Damn. We did the thing. The joke we have been making for THREE YEARS became a staple of a Vibe. Your vibe. Your way of running a session and being fully present for people without judgement, without response, and by the way — with hilarious of turn of phrase?! Obsessed. Damn. You. Love you and am so LUCKY that you are in my corner. Poetry collection of 2008 (or whatever the fuck that was) forever. And ever.


Brandy.

You wouldn’t let me get into it on the campsite bc I would cry and you would cry but now I’m just sitting alone crying, is that what you wanted?!??! Whelp. I think everyone should know very clearly that the way you just actively stepped up knowing that I would desperately need your help, and without judgement or like — why is this girl so incapable of anything —- in your mind — you made this event happen in a way I really definitely could not have on my own. You have done so much for me that I don’t even know how to properly celebrate you, or even feel like I deserve you — but I love you and I am so grateful and so very much looking forward to doing more. With you. Starting with the next vibe.


Emily Cordes

My darling, sweet friend. My MEGA force of talent and compassion. I loved being in drama therapy with you and sharing all of the things and I know we could have been in there ALL DAY throwing out as much as humanly possible into the orbit. People LOVED your workshop as well, I’m still hearing wonderful things about it, and I’m so, SO grateful that you are a part of my life and world. I continue to be so very lucky to have you.

OMG SAM EDDINGTON.

From a Prospect Park DJ to King Arthur himself, you have actually been so damn extraordinary all of the fucking time. I’m so, so grateful to you for sharing yourself so very much with this group of people — for sharing space with us so emphatically, and then JOINING US because…the woman in the bathtub is now in the woods. And you were like, great, let’s go. And I love you for it and hanging out at 6:30am was pretty dang cool, so…see you same place same time next year??


Dennissa Young

Nope. No. Stop. Stop it. STOP THAT RIGHT NOW because whatever you are doing is too good, too perfect, too magical. You are so magical and you are nothing short of an absolute GIFT. Do you understand what your presence does to a space?! Do you KNOW all of the ways in which we benefit from sharing a space with you?? You. Did. SO MUCH, so much more than you probably should have to make PDT happen. You tirelessly gave so much of yourself and I will never be able to express in words how grateful I am or how much you mean to me for doing all of this. Thank you, thank you thank you for your incredibly generous heart. This community exists because of you, and is so grateful to have you. I love you.


Jacob Watson

I’m still giving you a square here even though we really missed you there. Jacob, you’re wonderful. You are such a community builder and giver in your own right, and our experience was less without you. I learn something every time we talk, and I’m so constantly humbled that you’re willing and desirous to spend so much quality internet time with me. I hate that you couldn’t come, but I’m hoping to actually be in Chicago a bit this year and next — so there will be real hugs for us someday soon.

Nick Effing Fortugno.

I am CHUFFED AND CHALANT (the opposite of nonchalant, just fyi) that you came to the Vibe. THANK YOU for being cool cucumbers every damn day with such a wild experiment. THANK YOU for the privilege of your incredible contributions — you inspire me and model behavior/concept/ideas that all of us grow from. I am bummed that I couldn’t playtest your experience with you, but thank you truly for rolling with our chaotic first wild night and still bringing people memorable, positive experiences that I heard all about the next morning. I am a huge fan of all that is you.

Lynne Barbee

I can’t believe that I am truly THIS DAMN LUCKY to have a fairy godmother. And for that fairy godmother to be you. I watched Mallory’s video about how you made the Vibe and you really, really did. Thank you so much — beyond words, thank you — for sponsoring and providing so much support to this event. Thank you for navigating the many physical obstacles that you had to deal with just to be here. Thank you so much for believing in me enough to do this — I am so so lucky and grateful to have you — and this community is lucky and grateful to have you. I love you, Lynne, thank you so much.


Ira Gamerman

IRA. Ira!!! You embodied the vibe. You are an entire human vessel of and for good, you have done and continue to do so much for the world — and seeing you chillin’ with your mandolin, absolutely rock out with your mandolin (!!) and then yoga-ambient-groove with said mandolin BEFORE you read your script that everyone was obsessed with at the talent show…well. Yeah. I’m just so so so proud to know you. And I love you. And I’m grateful that you wanted to be with us this year. Thank you.


Amanda Simmons

Serving the A in MAM, meeting you finally and being with you in person — and creating memories with you, from DND, to FULL PLANKING/serving the blitzkreig properly, to “would you like aesthetic photos of your flowers?” honestly — you are so very good. Trophy wife. I’m telling you. Your gentle nature and lover of big feeling people and full on presence of heart and mind was always felt to me. I can’t wait for more things and more hugs. Thank you for seeing me and knowing me — so happy to have finally hugged you.

Edgardo “Captain” Parada

My actual Captain aboard my own ship. Your energy was EVERYTHING at this retreat. Thank you so, so much for being here. Our journey has been a very long and winding one, and your love and support and actually very positive guidance has meant so much to me for ALL OF THESE YEARS, and while we didn’t get to have much 1:1 real bonding time, seeing you sharing yourself with others and being so physically present with all of us — I just appreciate and love you so much. Thank you, truly.


Natalya, The Only One I’ve Ever Known

Hot DANG you are so good and special. I am so so lucky that Jonathan twice now brought us together, and twice now the entire community got to benefit from the privilege and pleasure of your company. I have too many memories of magical moments of you to actually bring any attention to any one thing — the one I’ll recount is when you were at the fire, and you were like, “Is Hidecki still spinning? I’m gonna finish this joint right here and throw down really hard with him in a minute.” and I was like, well, I think he’s winding down, so you should hurry? And you said “hey, you know, it will be what it will be.” But by the time I swung back around — there you were. Throwing down really hard, just as you said you would. And you were a pleasure to dance with and I can’t wait to do it again.


Heather Frew

“What was I gonna do, NOT come??” You said, when you expressed the woes of actually setting up a tent to actually sleep in to actually join the vibe. You overcame some big fears an senses of discomfort before you even showed up, and we are ALL better for it. You showed kindness in having a tent ROOMMATE!! You showed generosity in being a resident healer on our campus. You showed care in offering me the shelter of your umbrella — and I’m so so grateful and privileged and absolutely thrilled that you did all of those things. We benefit from your presence — what a loving, nurturing, wonderful gift you give.

Zander “Zandicorn” Ayeroff

More of a “yes” person in my LIFE I have never ever seen. I absolutely adore you, Zander — the fullness with which you are present, the completely down-to-clown whatever the ask is energy, the BAD BITCHES Immersive Theatre Co. forever, and just how inclusive, open, and joyful you are and always have been. It was a PLEASURE NPC-LARP-ing with you (we…teach peacocks, is it? To golf???) and I am hashtagblessed that you happened to be eastside so that you could join us for our revelry. See you in LA!!

David Schafran

“David Bathtub.” There was a moment where I was running all around the “dining hall” and I didn’t really have time to engage or take notice or say anything, but I saw you and my Dad having a forreal Noam Chomsky in depth conversation, and it warmed my heart. The night before I watched you sing along to his music, and it melted me, I mean, a little. And prior to that I saw you reclining in a hammock, prior to that I saw you engaging in conversation with someone you’d only just met, and prior to THAT, I saw Dennissa tag you in an instagram story playing some music while waiting for a train, and the whole time, honestly through all of it — I love watching you in the world. You are so very special.


Lauren Arenson

WOW okay crying hahahaha um??? You have been with me in my adult life in NYC from the START! I was just a little baby when we met, and when you believed in me hardcore for all that I was doing even then. I’m so so glad that it worked out for you to be with us this year. I know I already said this to you — but you bring so much. Your bright sense of things, your positive nature, your helpfulness, and your laugh that allows others to experience joy and share in that laughter, too — wow. Hot damn. I am so grateful. Thank you for those vegan cookies…they got gobbled up. And I LOVE my Elphaba nailpolish, and I love you.


Ally Ibach

Come. The fuck. On. YOU ARE A GIANT. You crashed into this community like everyone’s favorite tidal wave, and suddenly, here we all are, super psyched and pumped to be sharing this (horrible) world with you. THANK YOU for being curious and committed. Thank you for living fully in the world. Thank you for sharing so much heart and so much love with a whole SLEW of new people and doing it fearlessly and with joy. I am so impressed with you. I am so happy that we are now friends.

Jon Pedigo

My gas station bar friend. Do you have ANY idea how many people would turn to me after you’d walk by and be like, “um, he’s amazing.” “He’s super special.” “I love him.” and this is EXACTLY and accurately and truly how I feel about you. Every single moment I shared with you during this Vibe was something tender, like it was far away from this fucked up planet we love on. That’s what you do with your very spirit: you transport us. Every encounter I’ve had, from LA to New York, has been a pleasure, and I am so, so looking forward to more with you. I will never forget our sad hour time. It cemented my love for you always.


Hideki Watanabe

My most special treat of the retreat. You put the treat in retreat???? I was looking everywhere for you, has anyone seen the man I’ve never met?? And when Natalya assured me that wherever you were, that you are indeed a functioning adult and that you are honestly probably fine — neither of us knew that you were already set up to spin. Being with you was so damn satisfying. I knew you were a marvel from the internet. I just freaking knew it. I knew you were stylish and sweet and talented and so so so very good at hugging. I DIDN’T know just how fantastic of a DJ you were, I DIDN’T know that you were a brilliant and charming improviser, and there was no way I would know that you’d have an LED umbrella. My darling one. Thank you, thank you thank you for being with me, with us.


Adi Eshman

Hey, I’m a huge fan of yours. You are so singularly special. I am SO proud of your momentum. I love watching you work and watching you grow, watching you perform and teach and academia-ize and experiment. But my favorite moment regarding you was not even one where I was with you — it was my Dad telling me of your conversation with him about The Misfits, and I want to reiterate that I cried — your commitment to goodness and justice in the world moves me. I am so glad that it is for this very reason that we’ve crossed paths. I love you so much, my friend. Thank you, from my heart, for vibing with us.

Hallie Perlman

You absolute wild thing. It is so, so very wonderful to meet you. We orbited each other through a very wild weekend and every time I caught a glimpse of you, you were deep in conversation and laughter and joy with humans. (I mean, except for that one time you were sleeping. I mean okay, there was also the other time you were sleeping). It might come across as cliche to cite your performance at the talent show as my biggest takeaway from this — but to me, truly, your piece embodied what I think we have all set out here in this world to do — to create art that is affectionate, welcoming, warm and seeking joy in our otherwise bitter universe. I will remember it always. Thank your Mom for me 💖


Okay so perhaps this isn’t EXACTLY how I would have greeted all of these beautiful squares, it’s kind of more than 15 minutes worth of talking, but, you know. A long introductory and exit monologue is quite possibly A Vibe.

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